Thank you for visiting YEPP. The most important fact to know is that kids who learn from their parents about the dangers and consequences of underage drinking are less likely to use and abuse alcohol. On this page you will find links to additional helpful/informative sites; Tips and Tools; and a Parental Self Assessment
Tips and Tools
The first step in preventing underage drinking is talking with your teen about not using alcohol. So how do you begin? Here are some helpful tips to keep in mind when talking with your teen.
- Encourage conversation- Encourage them to talk about whatever they are interested in; give them a chance to teach you something. Being an active listener about other topics makes it easier to talk about topics that concern you.
- Ask open-ended questions- Avoid questions that have a “yes” or “no” answer. Instead ask them to share how they feel or think about the issue at hand.
- Control your emotions-Take some deep breaths and acknowledge your feelings in a constructive way if you hear something you don’t like.
- Make every conversation a positive experience- If you show respect for your teen’s viewpoint, they are more likely to listen to and respect yours.
It may be difficult to recognize if your teen is experiencing a problem with alcohol. This is because a lot of the warning signs are also symptoms of “growing pains” that are normal part of your teens’ development. However, if you notice a combination of the signs, or they seem extreme, this may indicate that your teen is experience a problem with alcohol. If you are concerned, share your concern with your teen and seek professional help from your doctor if you feel overwhelmed or would like more information.
Possible Warning Signs
- Abrupt changes in mood or attitude
- More irritable or argumentative
- School problems
- Rebelling against family rules
- Switching friends or withdraw from friends and family
- “Nothing matters” attitude
- Memory lapses; poor concentration
- Heightened secrecy about actions or possessions
- Finding alcohol in your child’s room or belongings
- Physical changes: including less appetite or continually hungry, weight changes, less interested in appearance, pale skin, bloodshot eyes, slurred or rapid speech, sudden and frequent use of breath mints.
Parents and other caregivers who monitor their teens can greatly reduce the risks of alcohol use and abuse. There are four areas where monitoring strategies can be effective.
They are:
BEFORE your teen leaves, make sure that curfews and rules are understood. Ask questions such as Where are you going? What are you doing? Who will you be with?
DURING the time away have your teen check in regularly
AFTER your teen arrives home check for coherence, talk about what happened, ask if alcohol was present
ONGOING monitoring includes talking frequently with your teen about alcohol. This includes knowing who your teen’s friends are; know the places they hang out; work with other parents to get emails and phone numbers; teach your teen how to refuse alcohol without embarrassment; be a good role model; praise and reward good behavior.
Social hosting is when a parent or an adult furnishes alcohol or a place to consume alcohol to underage youth. It is
ILLEGAL. Besides fines and possible jail time, parents can also lose the insurance policy on their home and be legally responsible if someone is injured because of the alcohol.
Here are some hints/tips to hosting an alcohol free party.
- Agree on a guest list and don’t let party crashers in.
- Discuss ground rules with your teen before the party.
- Have your teen plan the party with a responsible friend.
- Plan activities for the party.
- If a guest brings alcohol to the house, ask him/her to leave.
- Serve snacks and non-alcoholic drinks.
- Be visible and available-but don’t join the party!
The best way to combat underage drinking is to prevent it from starting. While talking with your teen is an important tool in preventing underage drinking, there are other steps you as a parent can take to prevent your teen from consuming alcohol.
GET INVOLVED
- Teach your teen how to have fun without drinking.
- Regularly help with homework.
- Encourage your teen to seek your help on important decisions.
- Eat dinners together as a family.
- Keep track of your teen’s activities.
- Set a good example.
- Monitor your teen’s media access, such as TV shows, Internet access, and cell phone use.
ESTABLISH AND ENFORCE RULES
- Set and enforce limits and boundaries
- Be consistent! Follow through by not furnishing alcohol or allowing alcohol to be consumed in your house.
- Lock up your liquor in your home and monitor
- Talk to the parent of your teen’s friends and come to an agreement on rules and expectations about underage drinking.
Parents may be unintentionally sending messages to their teens about how appealing alcohol can be. The following is a self-assessment* to see what messages you may be sending your teen.
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OFTEN
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SOMETIMES |
NEVER |
| Do you make lighthearted or joking comments about other people’s heavy drinking? (i.e. “He’s got a hollow leg.” |
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Do you tell funny or glorified stories about you or your friend’s drinking antics when you were younger?
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Do you ask your child to get you a drink from the fridge?
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| Do you wear t-shirts, baseball caps, etc. that advertise or promote drinking and/or specific brands of alcohol? |
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When watching television with your child, do you laugh at scenes where alcohol is being used?
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Do you see (and tell your child) drinking as a rite of passage for teenagers that can’t be avoided?
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Do you host adult social gatherings at your home where alcohol beverages are the only drinks served and/or drinking is the central focus?
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Do you assume that alcohol is a necessary part of any celebration or social gathering?
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Do you model using alcohol as a stress reduction tool? (i.e. comments like “I’ve had a long day, I need a drink?)
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| Do you offer alcohol to your teen as a “special treat” for celebrations, family gatherings, etc? |
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Do you host parties at your house where alcohol is served or available to teens?
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Does your child observe you drinking more than 2 or 3 drinks on any one occasion?
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If you answered “often” or sometimes” two or more times, you might be unintentionally sending mixed messages to your teen, and could be implying that it’s OK for him or her to drink or experiment with alcohol. Try to remain clear and consistent about the messages you are sending to your teens about the dangers of early and high-risk alcohol use. Remember, alcohol impacts teens differently than adults.
*Self-assessment provided by
www.maineparents.net
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